Kids… However old they are.
Separating from your life-partner – spouse – is hard enough. But… It’s at least kind of ‘natural’? t’s similar In the same kind of way to a child – eventually – losing a parent. Still hard. But natural.
For a child, divorce can be devastating (we need your help) – and it’s not our issue? It is totally unnatural – to have to separate ourself from a parent. It’s unnatural in a similar way to a parent losing a child? And having to cope with all that with a child’s, young, unformed mind makes it harder.
If you do nothing else, please listen to the message I have from kids to their divorcing parents:
- Please both of you spend time with us and contribute to our lives. Talk to and be respectful to our other parent – that would take so much pressure off me.
- Please both of you be around and show you care about us. Even if we hardly ever reply to your texts or emails, please still send them.
- Please both of you remember we are children and not your confidantes
- Please both of you consider us first in your lives and allow us to spend time just with our parentfor a while. Please don’t force a new family and ‘parent’ on us. Let us ‘grow into’ this change.
- Please don’t separate – or divorce – us. Your kids. We’re yours for life?
- And please don’t leave us to take care – emotionally – of your ex-spouse. Be patient and take care of my other parent that you are separating from until they’re back on their feet. It’s your mess, not mine.
- Icing on the cake would be to allow us to continue to be the centre of your world… Rather than you reclaiming the centre of your own lives and leaving us to scramble around on the edge.
We want to be free to love and be loved by both our parents.
Events today become the past – let our past be one we can be proud of?