Here I will put links to books and other reading material that over a 20+ year career have been extremely useful to my clients and to other counsellors.
Over a 60+ year lifetime these materials have also been transformative for me. They enabled me to heal and thrive, after some very difficult times. Remember: every person does their best. Always. Including us now. Not ‘the best’ as we would judge it to be. But ‘their’ best. At the time. Which may have been just awful for us.
Being fair, just, loving and kind to others is essential. Of course. But… It’s human to make mistakes. At the time we make those mistakes, we are just trying to get by and grow. We’re doing our best.
Remember to practice self-compassion. And compassion for others.
It’s also good to remember that those mistakes, our mistakes, may have had a tsunami of an effect on others whose lives they have touched. As did the overwhelm we experienced when someone else’s ‘best’ hurt us. Compassion and self-compassion don’t give us permission to hurt others but rather encourage us – give us the courage – to be aware of the consequences of our actions on others.
20:20 is perfect vision. I was so excited to welcome in 2020. I was sure it would be the best year ever. Well, we know how that ended. Or in fact, it hasn’t.
What’s happening today in Canada is the perfect example of the need for NVC (Non Violent Communication) in all walks of life. At all times.
Even the most peaceful people – Canadians – who lose sight of compassion and kindness toward others can quickly become divided and spiteful.
I was in a Hecklers comedy show the other night (end Nov 2021) and the ‘comedian’ warmed up the audience by eliciting cheers from the audience to support the vaccine and the vaccine passport. He then quite quickly went on to tell ‘anti-vaxxer’ jokes, including jokes about how it will be ‘great’ for our divided country when the anti-vaxxers die of covid: no more divisiveness. I’m fairly resilient but I was horrified and shocked. I walked out. If anyone told such ‘jokes’ about any other minority today they would be prosecuted for inciting hate. I couldn’t believe my ears.
“Rebellion” on Netflix is an awful reminder of what can happen when compassion goes out the window. And compassion has gone out the window for those who support the vaccine and those who don’t.
Passions today are fanned by government rhetoric and the media, not cool headedness, compassion or facts. As they were in Ireland and England. The Irish are a western people, in many ways similar to Canadians. The country is one religion, Christian – although some are Catholic and some are Protestant and that was used as the ‘reason’ for the trouble? Crazy. There are no discernible physical differences between either the Irish or Canadians. A peaceful solution could easily have been found. Eventually it was…
Until now Canadians could easily see such cruelty and evil and intolerance and were proud of the Canadian Charter of Rights, our ‘melting pot’ and our acceptance of minorities. They would never allow such an issue as that in Ireland?
After my experience in Hecklers, I am not so sure?
The distances between the mainland of BC and Vancouver Island – or BC and Alberta – are not unlike those between Ireland and England. Watch the movie. It’s horrifying. That ‘trouble’ was just a few years ago.
We are on the brink of something that dreadful happening again now. Is that truly what we want?
We need to practice compassion and kindness. Even when we find the subject beyond our understanding and logic. Never lose our humanity. Never lose respect for our brothers and sisters and the fact that it’s perfectly OK not to agree. That’s what democracy is all about?!
The freedom to choose was a priceless gift, given to us by our ancestors at great personal cost. Re-establishing that freedom may well cost us dearly again.
I believe that all of us are afraid. Tired, emotionally. Worn down by see-sawing government directives. And I am afraid that exhaustion is being used against us… There is an obscene amount of power and money here at stake.
Essentially we are all in that same boat: the one simply wanting the best – and safety – for our loved ones. And a return to life as normal.
We are allowing the media, unwittingly, the pharmaceutical companies, industry and governments to sell us their ‘strategy’: Vaccination?
There is a huge amount of money behind this ‘official narrative’. The vaccine.
It has been sold to us very effectively and most see it as the way to end this awful pandemic.
Others see it as yet another great threat.
Essentially we are allowing ‘them’ to divide us? When we are indeed – the people, not the puppeteers – in this together.
We are ALL afraid. We are ALL sick and tired, emotionally. We are ALL worn down by see-sawing government directives and lockdowns and masks.
We ALL want the best – and safety – for our loved ones. None of us are ‘granny killers’. Which is one of the awful things I heard the other night at Hecklers. We all have grannies and love them dearly. I am a grannie… I don’t want anyone to lose their job or be forcibly vaccinated for me. That’s a fact.
We simply want the freedom to choose how best to solve this issue. And there’s time. We need time to make the right choice. So far it has taken almost 2 whole years. And that’s OK.
Numbers are now quite low. Thank God. We have treatments other than just the vaccine. There is plenty of time to investigate and research and find solutions that we can all live with. The right solutions. For ALL of us. THIS IS WHY I CAME TO CANADA!
Trudeau please rescind the vaccine passport. Rescind mandatory vaccine in certain employment. End the violence, coercion, ‘nudging’, forcing…
Investigate. Research. Talk. Agree. Be strong. Be Brave. Be Canadian, True and Free…
Why is this ‘rant’ of mine relevant here in this ‘marketplace’? I am grateful to you for listening, thank you. It is here because I believe we can all research and investigate and learn from the experience of others and make our world better. This ‘marketplace’ offers reading that has been helpful to me, in my life. I invite you to consider it?
Compassion. Kindness. Calm. Kind. Compassionate. Calmness. Love…Compassion. Kindness. Calm. Kind. Compassionate. Calmness. Love…